Hetalia YDFE Collection
by A Sane Lunatic
Summary: Just a collection of all the drabbles/ficlets/songfics/etc I've written for Hetalia. Might include snippets from other fanfics I didn't want to include in the original thing. Chapter 3 - Sightseeing In China!
1. Chapter 1

**- AP Hetalia YDFE Collection -**

**Hetalia is © to H-sensei.**

_Ironic-tan's Blah: I know I should be updating on something else.  
*pouts* But seriously, I had an idea for all my random one-shots/drabbles/etcblah: I should just put them in one giant collection! That way I won't have unfinished stuff lying around. :D BTW: YDFE means __Y__aoi __D__rabbles & __F__iclets __E__tc. :3_

-~  
**Title: Ice Cream Kisses  
Summary: Yao and Ivan go to the fair. Ivan gets a giant bouquet of sunflowers for Yao, and Yao gets ice cream. Ruski-kun is jealous of the attention Yao is giving his ice cream, so he asks for a kiss. Or maybe we should say **_**demands **_**a kiss.  
Pairing****s****: RoChu  
Genre: Fluff, slash, slight AU  
Notes: This was inspired by a picture I saw on Pandatryoshka's tumblr. xD It was so cute! (It's also written for you, dearie! :D)  
Oh yeah, someone once asked me why I never describe Yao's lips as 'full', and she asked to be told here.  
Weeell, several reasons. xD First: 'full' is a word I would use to describe a black person's lips. (Not trying to be racist or anything, and I don't have anything against said people's lips; that's just me, ya?) Second: It sounds almost child-like, because most kids I know (and even me when I was a kid) have 'full' lips. O 3 o So yes. That's why, dearie. :3 anyway, whatever~…  
Warnings: There's mentioned **shmex**…**

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"Jao-Jao! Can we go now? Pleeeease? What's taking you so long, da? Jaooooo!" Ivan pawed at his lover's rarely-used bedroom door and let out a complaint that used to be words but sound more like a dog whining.

There was a muffled thump from the other side, and a few Chinese curses, and then it seemed that Yao was tripping around the room. "Wait a minute, will you, aru? It's only seven! It won't matter if we lose today, because it's going to be for the whole week aru!"

That reminded Ivan of something, and he fished a 'key' out of his coat pocket; to him it looked more like a stick that could be stuck into the keyhole and turned - (he didn't know why, but the realtor gave him keys for every room in the house, giggling madly and covering her nose with a tissue) and ended up picking the lock with it.

He jiggled the doorknob a few times and popped into the room, surprising Yao greatly, and making the jeans he was buttoning up fall and pool around his ankles. "Ivan! How did you – I locked the door aru!"

Ivan giggled and sat on Yao's bed, pulling the smaller into his lap. "I have my ways, da! You just reminded me of something, by the way." He grinned and ground his hips into Yao's, making him gasp and blush.

"A-aiya, haven't you had your fill aru?! Ivan! Nooooooo aru!" "Kolkolkolkolkol… Why is Jao resisting me?"

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A few hours later, Yao and Ivan wandered around the fair, Ivan holding a bouquet of sunflowers and humming what he'd titled 'The Vodka Song-da'. The silver haired Russian noted with a quickly-gone stab of guilt that Yao was limping slightly.

Every now and then, he winced. So he patted Yao's shoulder and pointed at an ice cream stand being run by the Vargas brothers. "Jao! Ice cream, da! Can we get some?"

Yao turned to look up at Ivan, but he was already at the stand, evilly-grinning the two terrified Italians into giving Yao a free vanilla cone. He sighed and slowly walked toward the stand, wondering why Ivan was suddenly interested in ice cream.

"H-h-here, ve, please take it!" Feliciano thrust an ice cream cone into Yao's hands, with two scoops of vanilla melting almost right away. "Thank you, aru." Yao smiled, kicked Ivan's shin and dropped a five dollar bill on the counter, then pulled the Russian away.

As soon as they were some distance from the stand, Ivan turned to Yao with a hurt pout. "Why did Jao kick me? I was just trying to make him feel better…." Yao raised an eyebrow at him, taking a lick of his ice cream. "I appreciate it, Ivan, but not your methods aru."

Ivan pouted even more, but left it at that for the moment. He sighed and tugged absentmindedly on the edge of his scarf, thinking what a drag the fair turned out to be when he was startled out of his thoughts by a soft, almost nonexistent moan from Yao.

"Jao? S'wrong?" The Russian turned, wishing he hadn't when he saw the cause of Yao's moan. Melted ice cream was dripping down the side of his chin, while vanilla mixed with the color of the sprinkles lightly coated the Asian's lips.

_Yao looks rapeable. _He grinned to himself, but frowned when Yao took another lick of his ice cream, obviously enjoying it. Ivan was kind of regretting ever buying him the sweet.

"Hm?" Yao had noticed him staring, and looked up. "Nothing, nothing, da~." Ivan said, smiling and waving off Yao's question. The raven-haired other shrugged and continued eating (in Ivan's opinion, doing things that should never be done to _ice cream, _but to him, damnit!) said sweet.

After a while of wandering pointlessly around, Yao _still _not finished with the now-offending ice cream, Ivan kind of snapped. "Jao!" He whined, poking the older on his shoulder.

Yao looked up at him and tilted his head. "What, aru?" "Jao, kiss me, da?" Yao turned red and looked around, then shook his head violently. "What are you thinking aru?! We-we-! Everyone can hear and see us you know aru!?"

Ivan winced, but picked Yao up and put him on his shoulder. "Then we shall go somewhere else da? I'm jealous of that ice cream…" Then he began to run to the edge of the forest, where no one would see them.

"I-Ivan, what is this all about aru!? You suddenly just demand a kiss aru?" Ivan pouted at him, and Yao couldn't help but nearly melt. "I'm jealous of all the attention you're giving your ice cream, Jao, you almost never do that to me."

Yao looked almost horrified, and Ivan continued, thinking that by the end of his little whine-fest Yao would apologize repeatedly and hug and coddle and pet him, kiss him, then, and maybe Ivan would slide a hand under his shirt and Yao would blush and be so adorable and then they'd – he blushed slightly, willing the images to stop, and pouted more.

"Jao pays more attention to ice cream or Hello Kitty than to me." "Wh-what aru!" Ivan almost giggled, but that would just earn him a hard slap upside the head. So he pouted even more.

Yao melted right then and as Ivan had predicted, pulled him into a tight hug, looking very nearly in tears. "I'm sorry aru! I never meant for it to be that way aru! I was just eating my ice cream…"

Ivan hugged back, sniffed for show, and pushed his head into Yao's chest. "I'm sorry, aru," Yao repeated, kissing hand and neck, where he could reach. "You'll forgive me, aru?"

Ivan nodded and let go of Yao, eyes shining in the sunset light with unshed tears. "Da, if Jao will kiss me…" Yao blushed, and Ivan pouted slightly, because he was blushing a little too early, but it didn't matter because he looked adorable anyway, and leaned in to kiss his little Asian.

"I'm sorry aru…" Yao whimpered again, when Ivan had let go of his lips. "It's fine, da, I was just kind of jealous." He grinned at Yao before jumping him right there.

"Aiyaaaa! What are you doing aruuu!" "Jao is resisting again… it will take more than a kiss to make me forgive him da." "O-okay! Just stop aru! It's – hey, I'm still sore! We just – Ivan, don't you remember this morning?!"

(The next week Yao wished he hadn't said anything: a certain 'Prussian' had overheard his pleas and told his perverted French friend, who told his Spanish friend, who told the perverted Hungarian girl who liked slash, who told Kiku, Yao's brother, and resulted in a flurry of sex jokes about them.)

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_Ironic-tan's End Blah: o 3 o use of the three letter s-word is a weird thing for me, even here.  
I'm embarrassed just by using it.  
Ahh, I should really not write these sort of fics. o 3 o  
Oyay, the Bad Touch Trio appear in the last part!  
'Appear'.  
No Irony, they don't appear, they're mentioned.  
MENTIONED.  
o m o I'm crazy.  
Oh yeah, that part that says 'Yao looks rapeable'.  
'Rapeable' is not my word.  
It was taken from lady-ribbon's fic __**From Russia, With Love.  
**__It's about Russia talking about Yao's 'perfect little ass' xD  
I really loved that fic. *heart heart heart*  
But anyway, I shall stop ranting now.  
Review, da?  
-uses Ivan's kawaii pout pout to pull on reader's heartstrings to convince him/her to review-  
_


	2. Chapter 2

**- AP Hetalia YDFE Collection -**

**Hetalia is © to Hima-papa.**

_Ironic-tan's Blah: Ohei, there's another one of these useless little probably-less-than-1k-word-things! Funny how when you feel like doing something, you can, Ironic-tan! (actually, I forced her to do this… Heh. –evil muse.)_

-~  
**Title: (Make up your own title, dearies, after you read this…)  
Summary: Yao's love is my drug. To be more precise, actually, Yao himself – his smile, his laugh, his everything – is my drug.  
I can't get enough of him.  
Rating: Err… decide if it's M or T+++ at the end, dearies.  
Pairing****s****: RoChu  
Genre: Slash, whatever this genre is… o:  
Notes: This is not a song fic. I suck at writing lime. (What, Ironic, is this even lime? I think It leans toward lemon. –Woodsy) I suck majorly at writing openings. I suck majorly at putting my thoughts down to make an ounce and a half of sense.  
Warnings: There **_**MIGHT**_** be weirdly dark themes that don't make any sense, mentions of very brutal killings (courtesy of the Vargas brothers), shmex, merp… You know what? I don't expect people to read this anyway… **

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"Ngh… Yìwan…" Pale fingers tangled in nearly-white hair, holding tightly to the silky tresses. Ivan smiled slightly, looking down at the moaning Chinese man below him.

"Da, Yao?" Yao glared at him through half-open eyes, but tried to lean up to kiss him anyway. "More in Chinese 'ere, thanks."

"You asked for it." Ivan husked into his ear, one hand reaching down to cup Yao's ass, grinning, and began to speed his pace.

"Y-Yìwan!" Yao's back arched off the bed, pressing their bodies closer; heating the room up even more and pushing Ivan closer to the edge.

Yao, it seemed, had already fallen, for his essence was spilling out, coating their chests and the rumpled bed sheets.

"Yao-!" Ivan sped up again, causing Yao to moan loudly, and came inside him. They fell, exhausted, onto the bed, and clasped hands.

"I love you…" Ivan whispered to the Chinese man, and Yao slapped his shoulder. "Shut up, the boss will kill you if he heard aru."

"I think he did." Ivan chuckled. Yao slapped him again, but to Ivan it felt sleepy. He chuckled again. "Go to sleep, da, I'll clean up."

Yao shook his head and put his arms around Ivan's shoulders. "No, aru, stay here. The door is locked anyway."

"Boss Vargas has a knife and a key." Ivan argued. "Whatever." Yao said, shaking his head. "Just go to sleep too, aru."

The silver-haired Russian smiled. "Da, da, Jao." "Yìwan… Before I do that aru…"

"Da?" Ivan looked up at Yao's face from where his head was laid on the Chinese man's chest, grinning.

"Tell me something I don't know aru. About anything." He yawned, and his eyelids fluttered shut; Ivan could tell he was desperately trying to keep awake.

"Your love is my drug, Jao. Your everything, actually. Your laugh, your eyes, your perfect peach bun ass…" Yao blushed slightly. "Oh, shut up aru."

Ivan shook his head, grinning. "You asked for it."

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_Ironic-tan's End Blah:  
__**Enter A/N that is probably longer than the actual fanfic.**__  
Was my Chinese okej there?  
-can't spell in Chinese to save her life-  
xD Please review and tell me I need a life.  
This is majorly messed up.  
Er, okej, Ivan didn't say 'Jao' in the first part…  
Hrmm…  
My headcanon is that during their 'becoming-one-with-Russia-da' sessions, Ivan _can _say Yao's name correctly.  
Other times, though, he doesn't, because he thinks it's cute.  
Now, about when Ivan calls one of the Italy twins 'boss Vargas'.  
He's talking about Romano. :3  
I couldn't get the words 'Italian mafia' out of my head while I wrote this, so it ended up that way.  
Ahhhh…  
-proofreads-  
AJKDSVFJSBFNMSADHM NEIN WHAT DID I JUST WRITE!?  
Please kill me, someone.  
It was so so so so so so sucky.  
Not that anyone cares.  
Do a good deed and leave a review for a review-deprived authoressa?  
Thank you! *heart heart heart*_


	3. Chapter 3

**Hetalia is © to Hima-papa.**

_Ironic-tan's Blah: Well, this time it's not Ironic. It's her friend, Shiro Tsumugi. And I wrote this._

-~  
**Title: 2 APHetaria Song Fics  
Summary: It was sort of a request from my friend and an urge to write songfics.  
Rating: T+  
Pairing****s****: RoChu and GiriPan  
Genre: Slash, fluff  
Notes: Songfics! Yey! The titles of the sings are all after the title.  
Er… All of these songs are in my youtube playlist. (Shiro's, not Ironic's.)  
Warnings: Mmm… -grope, ass slap, pervy grin- Human names and pervyness, lime~… Some AU ;3**

**Sightseeing Around China…  
Or In China  
Nihao*China  
(RoChu)**

Yurayura xiang you lan

acchi wo xiang you lan

midokoro mansai nii-hao chuugoku!

burabura mai dong xi

kocchi de mai dong xi

mekurumeku tokimeki nii-hao chuugoku!

"Jao!" Yao looked up from his chopping board, up at his mostly-childish and totally adorable Russian lover, who was tugging on his sleeve.

"Shi, aru?" "You said we could go see Beijing today, da! Can we go now? Now? Please?"

Yao raised an eyebrow at him. "But I'm making breakfast, aru." Ivan whined and tugged on his sleeve again.

"But we can have breakfast along the Jangtze da." Yao hit Ivan on the head with a ladle. "It's Yangtze, aru. And no, we're having breakfast here."

Ivan pouted at him and rubbed his head. "But-!" "But nothing, aru. Sit your ass down at the table and wait for me there aru."

Grumbling Ivan went to sit down, taking notice that Yao had said 'ass' instead of 'tush' which he usually said, and decided he'd just watch Yao dance around the kitchen, humming his song, and then maybe watch his splendid little ass dance with him.

He giggled at this thought, and began replaying the lyrics in his head.

_Leisurely, I want to sightsee, over there, I want to sightsee_

_Places of interest everywhere - Hello__China_

_Strolling idly, buying things, over here, buying things_

_Dazzling and exciting - Hello__China_

Ivan giggled again and stood up, snuck behind Yao and put his arms around the other's slender waist.

"Jao, I know another way to see Beijing, da." Yao blushed, but turned his head away and continued stirring the fried rice.

"Wh-what's that way aru?" Ivan giggled. "I just have to pull down your pants da."

"A-aiyaa, shut up! Let go! Hey, what are you doing aru!?" "Kolkolkol… Jao is already hard~!" "IVAN!"

**~~~~~}}|{{~~~~~**

**No Need To Excuse Your Need  
Excuse Me, I Am Sorry  
(GiriPan Lime)**

_Osoreirimasu, sumimasen!_

"Kiku?"

Herakles wandered through the empty hallways of his Japanese lover's home. It was cool, quiet, and the strange windows kept the building semi-dark.

"Kiku?" He called again, peeking into one of the rooms. Empty, save for a vase by the window.

Herakles sighed and closed the sliding door to think. _Where is he? I told him I'd be coming today…_

"…ngh~… He-ra-kles…" the Greek man paused to listen. Could that be Kiku? But why was he saying his name like that?

And why didn't he answer when Herakles called? "N-nhah!" Again. Herakles jumped up quietly and followed the sounds.

They came from the backyard, behind the old sakura tree. "Kiku?"

Herakles peeked over one of the branches at Kiku, then turned pink and turned away to hide a smirk.

"Ah-! Herakres-san! I-I can exprain!" Herakles hummed and shook his head, eyes taking in all of Kiku's pale, undressed legs and the part of his chest not hidden behind that annoying shirt.

"Hm?" Herakles raised an eyebrow and tilted his head. Kiku pulled his shirt down, blushing darkly.

Herakles chuckled lowly. It was funny how Kiku was so prudent when he was actually nearly naked in front of someone, yet he invented hentai, yaoi, yuri, and more hentai.

"E-excuse me… I'm sorry… I have to go…" The Japanese man jumped up and was about ready to run when Herakles picked him up and husked into his ear: "No need… to excuse your need…"


End file.
